Chosen Love: A BWWM Romance (Blazin' Love Book 4) Read online

  I open my laptop and dig in. I reach for my headphones to drown out the sounds of people talking, a crying baby, and the espresso machine when I hear a familiar sound. The hairs on my neck stand. My eyes sweep the room from the right to the left, slowly turning my body until I see her.

  My chest tightens. The woman who's haunted my dreams for six months is across the room. The sound was a moan. She's holding a to-go coffee cup with two hands. She brings the cup to her mouth, and her eyes lock with mine.

  A sense of relief fills my body. I lost something important, and it's not until this moment that my brain and heart stand in unity…it's Taylor.

  I missed her. I wanted her. But I wondered if I'd ever find her.

  She lowers the cup, and I see the tremble of her hands. I grab my bag, not wasting time. I cross the room. The moment I reach the table, she stands, and I fold her into my arms.

  Holding her is filling all the broken places in my soul, and I have no right. She could be back with her fiancé. She could have a new man in her life. Yet I hold her tight.

  I drop my mouth to her ear.

  "I missed the hell out of you."

  “I missed you too.”

  I pull back and see the tears gathering in her eyes. It's insane to think I missed her this much, but the void is apparent at this moment. I've been running from thing to thing, assignment to assignment when all I wanted was Taylor.

  I lower to the chair and place her on my lap. She doesn’t hesitate to wiggle getting comfortable.

  "How are you?" I ask, and she gathers my face in her hands, staring into my eyes. This is where she belongs.

  "Better now." I kiss her. And I want to touch her, to make sure it's not another dream. I hold her waist, rubbing my thumbs on her bare stomach. She drops her hands over my shoulders, resting her breast against my chest.

  "So much has happened. Business is growing. My database is working, but I'm having issues with it crashing." Her head drops to the side, causing her dreadlocks to cascade around me.

  "Mind if I take a look at it?" She smiles, showing her perfect teeth, but her mouth is my favorite. I kiss her again.

  “You program?”

  “Yes.” I smile, brushing my lips along her upper arm. She’s in a sleeveless crop top that makes me think of the matching underwear she wore the last time we were together. “Is orange your favorite color?”

  “Yes, how’d you know?”

  "A guess." I reach for my coffee to keep from running my hands over her toned body. "I program mostly firewalls and security features, but I'm well versed in Javascript, Python, Java, Php, and others."

  “Why didn’t I know this?”

  “We talked but never about our careers.” I push a lock of hair over her shoulder. My eyes hold hers. “I’d like to change that.”

  “I would too.” She leans closer.

  “And your ex?”

  “He’s no longer in the picture.”

  I'm smiling, and I want to take her back to my place. But I want to get to know her. "Can I have your number?"

  Her eyes round and her laughter spills over into my barren soul. The place I've never allowed another person because it's murky. Not even my ex-wife ventured to the depths of me. Is that why it didn't work out? Why she felt the need to seek pleasure from other men?

  “Where’d you go just now?”

  I caress her soft cheek, thankful for my ex's indiscretions because that's what landed me here with Taylor.

  “I thought about you every day for six months. I want you more than I’ve ever wanted a woman in my life. I just don’t want to mess this up. I’m…complicated but I’ve decided…”

  “What did you decide, Zach?”

  “That choosing you means I have to open up to you. This might not be the time or the place. But I can’t assume I’ll get the chance again. Are you down with that?”

  "I am, but first I have to tell you something." Her voice falls with her eyes. The subtle shake of her sweet body raises my senses.

  “What is it?” I lift her chin wanting to see her beautiful eyes.

  “I can’t have kids.” Her eyes go back to her hands fidgeting in her lap.

  “Okay.”

  "Okay?" She looks up obviously annoyed by my response. "Zach, I'm serious. I can't enter another relationship without placing it out there for us to discuss." She stands, and I place her back where she belongs. "Zach." Her soft plea makes me smile.

  “We’ll discuss whatever you want, but from right here.”

  “Fine.”

  I'm learning a lot about my woman. And yes, she's mine. I know it with everything in me. I was trained by the best, the United States Marine Corp, to know my opponents, to size them up and take them down. And Taylor doesn't know it, but I'm taking her and all of her walls down.

  “Taylor, I’ll do whatever I have to do to have you.”

  Her eyes snap to mine. The unshed tears in her eyes make my heart throb with a need to ensure she never sheds another tear from pain.

  “Even this?” She tries to look away.

  “I want you. Kids, no kids. Crazy ex. Crazy folks. Crazy friends.”

  "I think your hormones are talking. Because don't nobody want to deal with a crazy ex." She laughs, kissing the side of my hand. "And my friends are not crazy."

  I feel a goofy smile spread across my face. "I've dealt with the worst, and none of it compares to the possibility of having you.”

  “You can’t keep saying stuff like that.”

  “Why?” Her smile is everything right now.

  “Because…” she whispers.

  "Because of what?" I'll let her shrug go because I still see the doubt in her eyes. "I'm okay with it because I want you and because I've never wanted children." Her eyes round. "Don’t look at me like that.”

  “Sorry, I’ve just never heard a man say that.”

  "I grew up without my father, and my plans were always to be a career Marine. I never wanted a child to experience what I lived through. It's hard growing up as a man without a father. Thankfully, I had many mentors and men around me, growing up. But no one replaces a father."

  "I know…it's a hollow void." She kisses me, and the room disappears. "My mother raised me alone, too, except my father isn't dead. He just didn't want me."

  “What?”

  "Yeah. He paid child support every month. He set up my college fund, and I'm financially secure for the rest of my life. But I never had him." She shrugs. "It is what it is. He is where he is, and I am where I am. I've moved on."

  The pain in her eyes makes me want to find the man. I don't believe she's moved on. But this is not the place to explore it further.

  “He’s missing out on the best part of life, Taylor. That’s his bad. But I just want to know one thing.” I kiss her neck, letting the smell of her perfume surround me.

  "What's that, Zach?"

  "Can I be your boyfriend…your boo…your main squeeze…your old man?" She's laughing as I kiss her between each request. I can't believe this woman has me ready to make love to her in the middle of a cafe. But I do, and I want her to always be happy. I want to be the one that makes her happy.

  “Yes, Zach…yes to all of it.”

  She wraps her arms back around my neck. I'm in a cocoon of Taylor. We kiss. Her hands in my hair, running across my scalp. I drink her in, and my heart sends gratitude to the universe for creating this woman.

  I reluctantly end the kiss and hold up my phone. Her laugh makes me laugh. And all is well with my soul. “Now let me see this program before I jump your bones.”

  I swat her butt, and she stands taking her chair. I sense that we've just crossed a significant hurdle. I got my lady, and all is well with me.

  She turns the laptop in my direction. For the next couple of hours, we work side-by-side. Her coding is brilliant and intuitive. I find the code causing the crash. She walks me through her design, and I ask a series of questions. I think this would be a fantastic program for Darius to consider.


  “I have a friend with a business in town. He runs a factory. I think this program will help him manage his vendors and clients. I’d love to refer you.”

  “I’d like that. I’ve never considered taking on more clients. But I’m planning to hang around for a couple of weeks.”

  “Really? What brings you to town?”

  “I’m visiting my best friend and her boyfriend, which makes me think.” She glances at her watch. “I need to get running. They’re having a little gathering tonight.”

  I don’t want to leave her side after waiting for half a year.

  “Stop giving me that look.” She leans over and kisses me. “What to join us?”

  “Sure. I need to text Darius.” I open my text app not waiting for Taylor to change her mind.

  “Darius?”

  “Yes, he’s my boy. I’m supposed to stop by his place. But I can reschedule.”

  “Darius Grant?” she says with her head cocked to the side.

  “You know him?”

  The quiver of her lips tells me she's holding back a laugh. "I'm staying at his place."

  “What!” I sit straight up.

  “Not like that. Charlee is one of my best friends.”

  “You’re kidding?”

  She laughs, falling forward on the table. "So, you're the Zach they're planning to introduce me to tonight?"

  “I knew nothing about that. You’re dating?”

  “No, they were hoping to get me out of my funk.” She stands up and comes around the table. She lowers back to my lap. I like the way her fingers brush the sides of my neck.

  "You were in a funk? Over the breakup?" Knowing my Taylor still holds feelings for another dude doesn't settle well.

  "Yes and no. I was in a funk. It wasn't over the breakup but over losing touch with an exceptional guy."

  The heat in her eyes for someone else has me seeing stars. "I appreciate your honesty, but I can't handle you talking about another dude in my face."

  “I wouldn’t dare.”

  I’m confused. I glance off waiting to hear about this guy. Jealousy isn’t a natural response for me, but I have a growing suspicion that it’s the feeling causing my heart to race, that and the beautiful woman in my lap.

  I have no right to be jealous of another man. It's been six months, and we shared a single night together. One. And she has me so open I'm ready to kill the dude.

  Her lingering silence causes me to glance up, and I see a sneaky smile.

  “I’m waiting.” I look out the bay window across the room internally counting.

  "Zach, I'm talking about you, silly."

  My head snaps in her direction. “What?”

  “I realized too late that we didn’t exchange phone numbers.”

  "And I wanted to respect your request to keep it to one night. What changed your mind?" I kiss her pleased with her response.

  "I'm not sure I'm ready to share, but I've already told you my sad sappy story." She dips her head, a trait I notice when she’s embarrassed.

  "Tell me, baby."

  "You changed my mind. I had a night of firsts. But it wasn't that. I felt something with you I've never felt before, and I didn't want to go backward."

  My chest swells, knowing I made an impression. "We can continue this conversation in private. There's a park up the street. Let's walk and talk."

  I selfishly want time alone with her before I share her with the others. She stands, and we gather our belongings. I send Darius a text, and she texts Charlee.

  I’m ready to know more about this woman because I have no intentions of letting her go.

  Chapter 7

  Taylor

  “Zach and Darius are best friends.” I shake my head. “What are the chances?”

  “It’s crazy. Pass me that platter.” Charlee points to the cabinet behind me.

  This kitchen is a cook's dream. The beautiful marble countertops with black appliances. I turn around and see a clear glass serving dish. I place it on the counter. Together we load it with appetizers. I handle the veggies, and she's plating the warm finger foods. I can't miss the chance to tease Charlee.

  “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this domesticated.” We laugh.

  “Get a good eyeful. Because that fine man can have me pregnant and barefoot in this place and I’d say…yes, sir.”

  I throw my head back. She finds a way to bring life to every situation, even make side dishes for dinner under the stars. I steal a baby carrot from her perfect platter. "What do you think about Zach?"

  "He seems like a cool dude." She sobers, leaning against the counter. "What do you think?"

  "It's like we've known each forever and it's exciting. I'm starting something new after suffocating in something old." The words flow out, and I exhale. Wow…that's precisely how I feel. It's a new beginning. I pop the rest of the carrot in my mouth and look over at her.

  Charlee glances over her shoulder at the guys grilling outside before moving closer. She grabs my hands. "I need you to do something for me, Tae."

  “Sure.”

  “I can’t ask you not to rush into this. Hell, I moved in with Darius after less than a month of dating again. But please pace yourself. You were in a relationship with Les for your entire adult life. Take your time with Zach.”

  I swallow, I didn't expect this. "I've waited for months to find him."

  “I know, sweetie. No one wants you happy more than me. Just pace yourself.”

  "I hear you, Charlee," I whisper. She squeezes my hands, and we return to prepping the food.

  My mind races through a lifetime of thoughts, hurts, successes, failures. My father, my mother, Les, my guys, and the one common thread is I’ve never felt as happy as I do right now.

  Zach’s words flutter to mind, “…none of it compares to the possibility of having you.”

  I can't say Zach completes me. But I can say he presents an opportunity to experience something new, something real. Especially after telling him, I can't have kids. Maybe for once I can accept that giving birth is not in my plans but enjoying this season in my life with Zach is. Even if it's only for pleasure.

  I look over at my best friend, she’s preparing steamed vegetables and Jasmine rice. I think about her words and where she’s coming from.

  "Tae, I joke and clown around, but I want you happy. You've spent years fighting for a man who never seemed as invested as you were." She taps the spoon on the rim of the pot coming across the kitchen, standing beside me at the island.

  “I know. But I don’t like hearing you say it.”

  Charlee is not the pump your brakes kind of woman. She’s kick off your heels and throw caution to the wind. So, hearing her feelings hurt.

  Hunter found Ben. Harper found Liam. Charlee found Darius. I want to find someone too. I glance over her shoulder, and my eyes land on Zach.

  “I want you to find a real one. That’s all,” she adds.

  "I think I have…" He waves and I wave back. The corners of his eyes soften, and I decide to follow his lead. I'm choosing him, just as he's decided to choose me.

  "Fine. Keep making goo-goo eyes at him like I'm not talking." I kiss her cheek with a loud, smacking sound. "Save your nasty kisses for your man. But know this, if the shit hits the fan, I'll be the first guy swinging." She lowers into her fighter stance with her little fists up.

  “Girl, you’re a nut!” We laugh and hug. Charlee is our wild child. However, she’s the guy you want to ride with you. “I’ll be careful. I’m not getting lost in another man. But I’m ready to experience life with him.”

  “Ain’t nothing wrong with that. He’s definitely an upgrade.” I bump her with my hip. And she rolls her eyes.

  “Say I’m lying? I never knew what you saw in Les. But to each her own.” She flicks a dismissive hand.

  “Hush. Get the food before it gets cold.” I get her moving because she’ll start in on Les and it’s not the point. Not anymore. This is a new day, a new chance at love.

/>   “Whatever! Get the sweet tea.”

  We carry the food out as they remove the grilled salmon. We grab plates, and Darius blesses the food then we dig in.

  It’s a beautiful night.

  The patio table is rectangular. Zach and I sit on one side, Charlee and Darius on the other. I glance over my shoulder at Zach, and he reaches for my hand under the table. His hands are big and strong. He cups my hip and slides me closer. I lean into him, enjoying the animated conversation going on between Charlee and Darius.

  Charlee's hands are flying around. The moment Zach's fingers feather up my thigh, I can't hear a thing but my heart. I glance over, and he has a straight face. I figure two can play this game. I mimic his moves except I brush my hand across the soft linen holding his rock-hard manhood captive. I circle his head with my thumb.

  He chokes.

  “You all right man?” Darius asks with concern.

  “Nah, I'm good," he tells Darius, but his eyes are on me.

  I look over, loving this game. “You sure?”

  He drapes his arm behind me, but his hand crawls farther up my thigh until fingers brush my moist panties.

  He leans in, the moment his lips feather over my ear I can't breathe. "Is this how you want to play this game, baby? If so, I got you."

  “I’ll keep that in mind.”

  He pulls back, but his body still blocks me from seeing anything but him. The fire in his eyes makes me throb with need.

  "Well dayum take my girl on the table why don't ya!" Charlee says, and I don't blame her.

  “Babe.” Darius chuckles.

  “I’m just sayin’.”

  I drop my head.

  “Don’t be embarrassed. You should want your man.” Zach kisses me softly and sits back.

  We hang out for hours telling old stories until close to midnight. But the hum running through my body only heightens the more I'm with him. Then we start the cleanup process.

  Zach and I gather the paper products from outside. I place everything in a large trash bag. I turn, and he's waiting. His eyes follow me, and the intensity makes my knees weak.

  "What is it? You're making me nervous." I joke, but I'm serious. The man knows how to stop my racing thoughts with a glance.